Tag Archive Healing

ByDanielle

My One Word… A Reflection Of The Last Year

My one word in January 2014 was JOY! How I tried to find the JOY in each day. I did this for about a month. I had every intention of finding the JOY in everyday.

Honestly I did.

I tried.

 

#OneWord 2015 - Danielle - Joy

 

Then Emma got sick. Emma, our last beautiful gift from God, has Juvenile idiopathic arthritis. Basically her immune system attacks itself, it attacks her joints. The joints affected start at her jaw and really goes to her toes. It’s in her spine, hands, wrists, hips, tailbone, knees, ankles & toes. When Emma gets “the common cold” or any other illness her body cannot fight it.

In January she got influenza A. We were away when she got sick. I still found the JOY. She didn’t have to be admitted to the hospital. Medicines seemed to be helping. She was doing ok. Emma didn’t really recover from the flu & got strep. Then an ear infection, then a sinus infection, then another ear infection, then another sinus infection, then she got C-Diff. Emma was sick for 6 months.

At the end of May Emma started to feel better. Being sick for so long took its toll on her as well. She was sad. Couldn’t understand why this was happening to her. Her awaking happened about the same time as mine. She went to arthritis camp & had a blast, she was flared up badly and spent quite a bit of time with the nurse.

In July my Dad & Step-mom blessed us with funds to come visit everyone in New Hampshire. It was truly a blessing to go there. I had been really homesick and needed to hug my Mom, Dad, step-mom,sisters & nieces. I just needed my family. We had some great adventures out there both, with family & alone. We went zip lining and by we I mean Sophia & Emma. I sat at a coffee shop having an iced cuppa. We went to the White Mountains and just soaked in God’s beautiful creation. We went to the ocean and again was mystified at its beauty. We saw a wild black bear at my Dad’s house which was amazing! We sat out by the campfire watching the shooting stars & just having amazing conversation. If it makes any sense, I have faith, I love Jesus and believe in Him with all my heart, but at the same time I was lost. I didn’t pray. I didn’t read my Bible. I wasn’t depending on my Creator to heal my child.

I realized in October my JOY was forgotten. All I needed, all I wanted was for my beautiful child to be healthy. I forgot about God. I didn’t pray, I didn’t read my Bible. I didn’t really go to church. People, family, friends would ask how are you? I’d lie and say everything is wonderful. Friends would invite us over or out and we would decline. Emma can’t be around anyone with a runny nose or cough. While all this was going on I withdrew.

I stopped relying on my friends. Depression set in for me. My friends reached out, on more than one occasion. I had shut down. Some of my friends aren’t really my friends anymore. That makes me sad. Sad that they just don’t understand. Emma looks fine, she even acts fine. What no one sees is when we get home she is tired, her body hurts. She will never complain. I’ve learned her cues. I know when something is bothering her.

Emma is sick. Emma. Is. Sick. I claimed that. I didn’t claim Emma is healed by what Christ has already done for her! For 10 months I claimed the wrong thing.

In September Emma started a new medicine. It requires us to go to the hospital 3 hours away once a month. After the 1st 2 treatments Emma was starting to come out of this chronic flare she had been in for 9 months. I realized, JOY! I also realized, as much as I believe in God, as much faith as I have in Jesus I realized I hadn’t fallen at the feet of Jesus. I hadn’t prayed. I hadn’t read my Bible once this year. I was present, but I wasn’t. About 6 weeks ago Emma got sick. Strep. Sinus infection. Bronchitis, belly virus. Trips to the doctor. Trips to Iowa City to see the specialists.

I realized today a few weeks ago at church that I still am not relying of God. Why am I not? At church today a man shared his testimony about the day his daughter was born. She was born by emergency C-section. She was born lifeless and grey. The doctors took her to work on her. He was praying with his wife and clearly heard the Spirit say go lay hands on your daughter and pray with her. He told his wife and she said go, go like he should have been gone 5 minutes ago. He went to the NICU and told the 15 nurses and doctors working on his daughter he needed to pray with his daughter. His prayer? LIFE! In Jesus name LIFE! In that moment his daughter started breathing. Her heart was beating on its own. Her color went from grey to pink. She opened her eyes turned her head and looked at her Dad & smiled. LIFE!

I realized today I can rely on my Christian friends. I can ask my family/friends to pray for my children. I can ask God for anything. He’s been telling me for months- FALL ON ME! I’ve already healed her. You just need to believe and have faith. Go to your church elders and have them lay hands on Emma. Danielle SHE IS HEALED.

I claim this. She. Is. Healed. JOY in everything. Joy in everything. Jesus is my JOY. So for the coming year my word is joy.

JOY!
I’ve got the joy joy joy down in my heart!
Down in my heart!!

ByJennifer A. Janes

Success Is Possible, Even After You’ve Blown It

As moms, we’re pretty hard on ourselves. If dinner burns, we forgot to get five things at the grocery store (although, in all fairness, they weren’t on the list), the kids misbehaved in Sunday school, or the neighbor complains that our dog is too noisy, we’re quick to blame ourselves. But what about when a marriage struggles, relationships with our children are strained, or we lose a job? Right. We blame ourselves there too.

 

Success is possible, Even after you've blown it - Jennifer A. Janes - Raising Sticky Hands To Heaven - RaisingStickyHands.com

 

We’re human. Of course we bear part of the blame! But most of these scenarios involve situations and people that we can’t control on our own. So we aren’t wholly to blame, even though it feels like it.

 

How do you recover from failures like these? How do you survive the stress and strain? How do you find success again? There are solutions, and they’re not as complicated as you might expect, whether the issues are big or small:

 

 

  • Seek forgiveness. From God, the people you’ve hurt or offended, and yourself. Without forgiveness, you may find a root of bitterness, anger, or resentment taking root, and that will make your problems worse, not better.
  • Ask God what you can do to change the situation. Obviously, a recipe that needs tweaking will be much easier to fix than a relationship that needs repair. God has the answers for every situation, and He can show you exactly what to do to facilitate the healing and restoration that need to take place.
  • Pray for the other people involved. Pray that while God is doing a work in you, that the other people involved in the situation will allow Him to work in their lives too.
  • Remember that your today doesn’t define your tomorrow. While we sometimes have to live with the consequences of today’s choices for a long time, it doesn’t mean that we’re trapped into continuing along the same path indefinitely. You can choose to make a different choice today than you made yesterday, and God is right there to help you do it.
  • Take deep breaths. If you’re living in the aftermath of abuse or divorce, it can be easy to respond as if the family members in your life today are the same ones who caused you so much pain and heartache in the past. Don’t let your past ruin your relationships with people who behave like they’re supposed to but are human and make mistakes. I have had to do this when confronted with possible trust issues with my husband. He is not the man who hurt me so many years ago.

Obviously, these are pretty vague, and they don’t apply equally to all situations, but the basic principles are there. God can help you through any failure you find yourself in. He will see you through all the pain and heartache to the other side, if you will surrender yourself to Him to bring the healing and restoration you need.

BySherry

Hannah’s Prayer: 1 Samuel 1:1 – 2:11

Read about Hannah’s Prayer in the Bible! It can be found in the book of 1 Samuel 1:1 – 2:11.


In November 2000, my husband, Matt, and I decided that we wanted to try and have another baby. So I went off the birth control pill and we started the process of adding another child into the Williams household. Already having a daughter in the mix, I desperately wanted a little boy. Someone who looked like my husband, and had an imagination like Calvin from the comic strip Calvin & Hobbes. We had gotten pregnant pretty quickly with Sarah, so I expecting a quick turn around this time. Yet, every month I would either start my cycle or have a negative pregnancy test.

 

Feeling pretty discouraged I talked with my mom. She had read an article about Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). She thought I had that and wanted me to take the test in the magazine. So I did. It completely described me to a T. I went to my Dr with the article in hand, and discussed the problem with him. He thought there was also a good chance that I might have PCOS, and referred me to an Endocrinologist. The day of my appointment, Matt and I nervously went in to the new Dr. He wanted to have an ultrasound of my ovaries. Honest to God, they looked like a bag of marbles. He said, “You do have PCOS. Instead of producing eggs, your body is producing cysts. If you are going to have another child, it will have to be through fertility drugs.” He gave me a regime of pills to take to get my body back under control. During this time, I began to read the story of Hannah in 1 Samuel and felt her pain and longing for a son. I began to pray her prayer, as well as her praise. For even if I didn’t get a son, a still had a beautiful daughter whom God saw fit to give me.

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Three months later, we went back for a check up, to our dismay the pills he gave me didn’t work. He said that he wanted to start the fertility process with us. He gave us the run down of what that would entail. It seemed like there was so much to process at one time. Then he handed me a ton of prescriptions and told me to start taking them right away. One was to start my cycle, as I had not had one in 4 months. He said to me, “First take a pregnancy test. It will be negative, but better safe than sorry.”

 

Matt and I walked to our car like zombies. I looked at all of the prescriptions and said to him, “I don’t know if I want to do this.” He felt the same way. So we decided that we would spend 1 week praying and talking with our family regarding the fertility, as this would be a big deal to them too. So we did, we talked with people who had one child and asked the pros and cons, we also talked to quite a few only children. As the week wore on, Matt and I truly felt that God was telling us not to take the fertility drugs. Matt and I obeyed! It was not an easy thing to trust Him with this, but we did.

 

On September 10, 2001, I had lunch with our babysitter and told her our decision. She prayed with me and said that God was in control and we were doing good by listening. She also suggested that I take the pills to start my cycle as it had been too long since I had one. So I went and bought a test and had that prescription filled.

 

At 5:50 a.m., September 11th, Matt woke me up and asked me to listen to the new that a plane had hit the World Trade Center. So I got up, went to the bathroom, and took my pregnancy test. As the radio announcer said, “Oh my god, another plane just hit the 2nd tower!” I was looking at a positive pregnancy test. I was stunned. I grabbed the phone and desperately tried to call Matt. After 20 minutes he called me and asked what was going on. I told him I was pregnant. He said, “No, in the news. WHAT?!”

 

I really tried not to get myself excited over the test, because they had been wrong before. So I waited until my doctor’s office was open and went in for a blood test. One hour later, I got a call that I was truly expecting. It was a miracle. I recited Hannah’s praise right there at work. I always say 9/11/2001 was a very bittersweet day for me.

 

In May of 2002, I gave birth to our son, Lucas James Williams. He was 6 lbs. 9 oz., and 20 inches long. Yes, he kind of looks like Matt with the blond hair and hazel eyes, and acts very much like Calvin (I now understand Calvin’s mom). He also wants to be a firefighter and join the military, something he has said since he was 4.

 

Hannah's Prayer

 

I want to now fast forward to October 2013. I had the opportunity to take a tour in Israel. Our guide took us to Ramah, where Hannah and Elkannah lived. They recently found Hannah’s spring. Now I know in 1st Samuel the prayer written down took place in Shiloh, but also being in the situation Hannah was in, I could see her praying at this spring, as other mother’s bathed their children. Close by was a fig tree, and I could see her with Samuel on her knee teaching him about God. I began to weep and shared my story with the group. God is so good, and He gave each of us a small glimpse into scripture that touched us to the very core of our being.

Sherry - Hannah's Prayer

What was even better, was 2 days later, our guide took us to Ancient Shiloh, where they are uncovering the site of the Tabernacle. This is the place where Hannah cried out to God for a son. This is where Eli told her prayer would come true. The best thing about this is the day we went to Ancient Shiloh, we had a new guide, and he didn’t know about what I spoke at Hannah’s spring. So I received a double blessing on my trip. Isn’t it amazing that God cares about us so much that He will give us a special glimpse into His word. A story that I’ve heard hundreds of times, yet it has taken on a new meaning. Even now, as I read the first two chapters of first Samuel, I can see Hannah praying at the Tabernacle, I can see her teaching Samuel and she weaned him. I can see him running around the fig tree.

Tree - Hannah's Prayer

I want you know that even if you are going through a time of longing for a child, God is in control. It may mean fertility treatment. It may mean a miracle like mine, and so many others. God is in every one of our stories. I beg of you, listen for God’s voice. Read his word. There are numerous stories like Hannah in the Old Testament.

 

This is a view of the Outer Court — at Ancient Shiloh.

This is a view of the Outer Court — at Ancient Shiloh.

I have added pictures of Hannah’s spring, the fig tree near the spring, and Ancient Shiloh, where the tabernacle sat for nearly 400 years. The big stone square is the sacrificial altar they are digging up.

 

A view of the inner court and Holiest of Holies — at Ancient Shiloh.

A view of the inner court and Holiest of Holies — at Ancient Shiloh.

 

ByEmily

Receive

“49So Jesus stood still and commanded him to be called. Then they called the blind man, saying him, ‘Be of good cheer. Rise, He is calling you.’ 50And throwing aside his garment, he rose and came to Jesus. 51So Jesus answered and said to him, ‘What do you want Me to do for you?’ The blind man said to Him, ‘Rabboni, that I may receive my sight.’ 52Then Jesus said to him, ‘Go your way; your faith has made you well.’ And immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus on the road.”

Mark 10:49-52

 

Receive

 

Take a look at verse 52 and read it over again.

It doesn’t say, “And immediately he saw.”

It doesn’t say, “And immediately his eyes were opened.”

It doesn’t say, “And immediately he was healed.”

It says, “And immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus…..”

He RECEIVED his sight! Many times God has already given us what we need, or what it is we’ve been seeking after. We just haven’t stopped to receive it.

Today, let’s learn a lesson…not from ‘The Blind Man,’ but from ‘The Man who Once was Blind.’ Receive whatever it is God is giving you!

ByKaren

No Good, Very Bad Day, Err… Week (A Call For Prayer!)

The above title is partly taken from a book that I’ve read before, but this phrase has stuck with me on this day.

 

Photo Credit Maira Kouvara

Photo Credit Maira Kouvara

 

Have you ever had one of those days (and I’m sure you have or you wouldn’t be human) where everything went wrong? Every time you turned around, something else was happening that was turning everything upside down, inside out, and throwing everything off?

 

Photo Credit Maira Kouvara

Photo Credit Maira Kouvara

 

Well, today would have been one of those days for me. As a matter of fact, the last several days have been that way. Aggravation has been the yoke around my neck. The kids have not listened to anything all week long and it is all catching up with me.

This is supposed to be summer break since school is out, but I haven’t had a break yet… with no end in sight. “Can you do this for me?”, “Can you do such and such for this situation?”, “We need your help. It takes everybody together to get things done.”… yet while I usually enjoy helping others, getting “weary in well doing” has set in. Rarely getting a “thank you”, is becoming noticeable, though I know I’m not supposed to be expecting one. If I don’t help do something, I feel bad about it.

Photo Credit Maxime Perron Caissy

Photo Credit Maxime Perron Caissy

 

I have no one to help me when I need it though. My house has gotten away from me, the kids are acting like we haven’t raised them right at all, money isn’t coming in like it should, though I’ve never seen the righteous forsaken nor His seed begging bread! My God shall supply all our needs according to His riches in glory!

I’ve been helping David mow to save time and money, especially on Wednesdays, so that he can go to church with us as a family. Otherwise, he wouldn’t get finished in time. Well, yesterday was a busy day for me from sun up to sun down. My time was cut short for mowing due to my doctor’s appointment, taking the kids and picking them up from Bible School, waiting at the pharmacy, Josie’s orthodontist appointment, getting supper, getting kids to church an hour early so that they could have dance practice, and still mowing these “Wednesday yards” for our lawn care service. With our oldest son helping, it takes about 1 hour and 45 minutes to do 2 particular homes. I had a certain time to be home to get a shower before Jo’s appt. The yard of these 2 that I take care of is rather large. Somehow, I gently “backed” my 60 inch, zero turn John Deere mower into the garage door. Barely tapped it, but left a HUGE indention anyways. Though we have mowers insurance, the way it works defeats the purpose of having it, so now, I’m have to price garage door panels (2) to replace them. Thank God the home owner wasn’t mad and is generally “easy going”. Another day; Another dollar; Out the window and not taking care of our bills or groceries… URGH!

 

Photo Credit Colin Brough

Photo Credit Colin Brough

 

Then today, our other mower, same brand and size, fairly new, just stops working… Won’t even come on. No explanation thus far. The hedge trimmers have gone out. Though David is the Fire Chief, that is not our main income, (doesn’t bring in as much as what people would expect.) Our mowing is our main income and it seems like everything is going haywire.

 

Photo Credit Chris Scott

Photo Credit Chris Scott

 

Today, I also spent 4 and a half hours in the E.R. with Josie. She’s had right side pain for 5 days. Since her Dr. is going out of town, she wanted to go ahead and get a cat scan done to be on the safe side. She has had a cyst burst on her ovary.

It can only get better from here, right? Right? I am soooo tired. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. Spiritually. Drained.

 

Photo Credit Vaughan Willis

Photo Credit Vaughan Willis

 

As I said before, usually I LOVE helping others. I live for it. I just need a break for just one little moment. Just to let me catch my breath and get some healing. Then, I’ll jump back in with both feet and go just as hard if not harder! I want to be Kingdom minded with all of my heart. To be the extension of Christ’s hands and feet. I want a servants heart.

With that said, I’m asking, begging, for prayer! For strength, restoration, for I know that joy is going to come in the morning! Thank you for reading my whining with the realization that I am a Christian that is still human and I face everyday struggles just like you. I greatly appreciate the prayers! Be blessed!

 

Photo Credit Martin Boulanger

Photo Credit Martin Boulanger

 

Note from Angie: UPDATE! This post was written on June 6th by Karen. (Due to my health it sat in my inbox waiting to be posted. Sorry Karen!)

Since then, her health, among other things, has been attacking her left and right. She is a strong woman of God and the enemy does not like what she is doing for The Lord’s Kingdom! Please be in prayer for Karen, her family, their finances, and all of their health.

Actually, make that for all of our bloggers… Everyone at RSHTH has been under attack lately! We are kicking that devil under our feet and claiming what is rightly ours!

Will you join us in prayer? Please and thank you. I’m so tired of seeing my best friend suffer, and she is tired of seeing me suffer as well. We declare HEALING in the name of JESUS! AMEN!

 

We are declaring WAR against the enemy! We must stop these attacks. We will NOT stand by and allow this to continually happen to us or our loved ones.  Pray with us! Photo Credit Remigiusz Szczerbak

We are declaring WAR against the enemy! We must stop these attacks. We will NOT stand by and allow this to continually happen to us or our loved ones. Pray with us!
Photo Credit Remigiusz Szczerbak

ByAngie

Boasting In The Lord – A Look Back At A Guest Post & A Praise Report

A little over a month ago I had the privilege of being able to guest post over at Future.Flying.Saucers.

 

Future.Flying.Saucers Logo

 

Have you ever gone through something that all the while challenging, you were still boasting in the Lord? So have I. This guest post was about a recent struggle I went through dealing with chronic pain that at one point was thought to be due to rheumatoid arthritis.

Well, I am excited to announce that since this post went live, my diagnosis was found to be wrong. Oh, what a thrill! Instead of a life long auto-immune disease, I have a vitamin D deficiency. To fix this I simply need more outdoor time, more milk, and a daily vitamin. In a few months I should be feeling a lot better! I still have fibromyalgia, but I will still be boasting in the Lord while I deal with that chronic pain and have faith just as before.

Unfortunately, due to illness I was unable to share this post with you when it originally published and haven’t had a chance to do so until now. First I had mild case of chicken pox. They cleared up really quickly, but I soon became really sick in other ways. Originally I assumed it was from the medication I took to help with the pox, but last week during a visit to the emergency room I found out I have a blood clot in my ovary. Yesterday, I had another visit to the doctor due to an infection I have come down with due to a high dosage of blood thinners. Now, I may be possibly facing surgery to remove the ovary if the doctors decide it is necessary. But you know what? That’s okay. God’s got this. You will STILL find me boasting in the Lord!

So now, enough of that… Head on over to Future.Flying.Saucers and see the original post!  You will LOVE this blog, even if you don’t homeschool. If you teach children’s church or Sunday school, you will really appreciate her Sunday school lessons. She is an honest, down to earth, tell it like it is woman of God. So be sure to “Like” Future.Flying.Saucers on Facebook so you won’t miss a thing.

After you’re done over there, come on back and let me know if you’ve ever gone through an illness, no matter how minor or major, where you received one diagnosis only to find out later it was something else… Did God teach you a lesson in the process? I’d love to know!

Keep on boasting in the Lord! I will be. 🙂

 

ByKaren

And Life Goes On….

It has been a while since I have blogged.  I’ve been sick, busy, sick, etc…

In March, I had to have a hysterectomy with bladder and rectal repair.  I wasn’t prepared for the insomnia, the emotional turmoil, the hot flashes, or crying.

I’m well past my “6 week” recovery, but as I have found, and many other women told me, it will be a while yet before I feel like “me”.

Now it’s June. My allergies have turned into a sinus infection, an ear infection, upper respiratory infection, and bronchitis.  My immune system is not as strong as it used to be. Man this gets old really fast…  therefore, I covet your prayers!

I am looking towards the hills where my help comes from, my help cometh from the Lord!!! LOL I totally need healing, energy, my voice back, and strength. I have to remind myself that He is my Jehovah Rapha, God who healeth!

So if any of you are having health issues or anything else that you would like us to pray about, please let us know so that we can be praying for you.

ByEmily

Thanks, Lord! That Was Just What I Needed! K, Bye!

Has God ever done anything for you? I’m sure He has- you’re reading this, right? That means you woke up this morning with breath in your body. There was no hearse at your front door. And I’m sure that’s just one of many. He’s done amazing things for me in my life, and in the life of my friends and family.

Yesterday, my husband, Markus, preached a message (and did a great job!) about forgetting what God has done for us. If it weren’t for God, we could be lost, in jail, dead, still in Egypt’s bondage, etc. Yet, we tend to overlook all He’s done for us in the midst of the everyday chaos of life.

Today I want to share with you the story of a mighty woman from the Bible who could teach all of us a BIG lesson on how to react to the blessings of an Almighty God. Sure, her story is very short, all of two scriptures long. And sure, she doesn’t even have a name (that I know of) other than “Peter’s Mother-in-Law,” but we should all strive to be just like her. Watch this…

“Now when Jesus had come into Peter’s house, He saw his wife’s mother lying sick with a fever. So He touched her hand, and the fever left her. And she arose and served them.”- Matthew 8:14-15

Did you see that? The very last line…“And she arose and served them.” Jesus had done something wonderful for her. He healed her. Her response? She immediately arose to serve Him. Wow! That simply simple statement just blows my mind. Why? Because I have been in church all my life, and for the past several years, I have been involved not just as a member, but as a part of leadership. You know what I have noticed? People come in needing/wanting something from the Lord. When they get what they came for, they walk right back out the doors, never to be heard from again until there’s something else they need/want. Really? You mean, you’ve noticed this, too? It’s a pretty disappointing cycle.

Peter’s mother-in-law was the exact opposite. She didn’t walk out the door because she got what she needed from Jesus, never to be heard from again. Instead, she began to serve the One who made her whole. She became a servant to the One who supplied her need.

That’s how we’re supposed to react to the greatness of our Lord and all the blessings He has bestowed upon us. We are to serve Him. In becoming His servant, we will gain a servant’s heart. In gaining a servant’s heart, we have a desire to serve…a call to servant hood. Living a life of servant hood makes us an example and a light to a lost and dying world. That’s what the lost need to see…a Christian with desire to serve the living God, not a “Christian” who only lives the life in time of need.

As I said, we could all learn from this woman, myself included. Think about everything the Lord has done for you, great or small. No matter what it is, He deserves for us to love and serve Him in return. Yes, He gives us free will and allows us to choose how to respond. But what He deserves is a child that will love and serve Him.

By

My Daughter, And Her Love For Amy Grant… Though She Doesn’t Know It Yet…

Beccarie

Beccarie

In 2002, 2 days before Mother’s Day, I found out I was pregnant with my daughter, Becca. Talk about the best Mother’s Day gift a mother could receive! I was in shock, excited, and calm. It was right. I just knew it. I had a 14 month old son, and had suffered a few miscarriages. I knew this time was going to work out just right.

On Sep. 10th, 2002, we found out she was “likely a girl”. Gotta love small towns. 😉 Her Dad and I ran out to “The Bookie” and bought her a Washington State University Cougar’s Cheerleading Uniform in an infant size. We were thrilled. A boy, Jeffrey, and now a girl! How could things be more perfect?!

A few months before I had bought Amy Grant’s “The Collection” CD. (From Columbia House! Anyone remember THAT?! And, yes, CD. MP3s were only on PCs at that time, and in my bedroom while reading, that was not available. You had to be rich to have more than one laptop that lasted more than 2 hours on battery… and wireless network? Hahaha… You’re funny…) From the time I found out I was pregnant with her I was DRAWN to this cd. I can’t even begin to explain it. The same way that while in labor with my oldest son I listened to Keith Green when I could stand noise, with her it was Amy Grant’s “The Collection”.

Becca, Jeffrey, and myself in 2006… right before Bobby came into our lives

I remember the exact moment like it was 10 seconds ago. I was in chapter 5 of “Bringing Up Boys” by Dr. James Dobson. I was listening to “The Collection” by Amy Grant when I heard a “Pop” and I felt it. The song playing was “El Shaddai”.  At that moment I was lying on my left side, looking at the book, when I felt a trickle of fluid run down my left leg and a tear drop down my left cheek. I was crying and devastated. “Dear Lord, this can’t be happening. Please, let this be nothing…” I was just barely past 24 weeks and being just barely past the “Age of viability”, I knew the hospital would do little to help. I jumped up and told my then husband, who was writing a school paper, and called the Doctor. It was just after 2 am.

I was sent immediately to the hospital. I was met there by an amazing Emergency staff waiting for me with a wheel chair. They even let me park my car in the place reserved for ambulances. I was taken by wheelchair to the Maternity Ward, holding back my tears. I had been through a late miscarriage before, but nothing like this. I didn’t know what to expect. All the while I sang in my heart and head “El Shaddai”.

Becca with her step daddy, Jeffrey, and first baby brother, Tommy.

Soon after, an awesome midwife was sent in to see me. (I wish for the love of all things holy that I could remember her name. She was amazing and awesome through my entire pregnancy. Hormones, sheesh. 😉 I do know she had a love for all things electronic and was jealous for my then husband’s giant box of a laptop. (It didn’t seem like a box way back then.) If you by chance know her name or a way for me to send her an email or card, PLEASE let me know.) She sat with me for most of the many long hours that I sat there until my fear was confirmed. My amazing family Doctor, Dr Emtman, walked in with sad news. My water, had indeed, broken. I felt so guilty, somehow I was at fault for this. As much as he assured me it wasn’t my fault, I just knew I did this. I still blame myself a little for it… but it happened and nothing will change that.

2 short hours later I was on a helicopter to Spokane, WA. I couldn’t grasp what was happening. I was short on sleep, well, actually without. I was without my husband or baby, and on a HELICOPTER! The way it was set up, the helicopter had me looking towards the ground as I laid in the gurney. Freaky? LIGHTWEIGHT!

In what seemed like hours but was only minutes, I was at Deaconess Hospital. Honestly, it was all a whirlwind. I was asked so many questions. Poked, prodded, questioned, and consoled. Within minutes they caught I was contracting by my saying I had a “Horrible burning and tightening”  and stopped it with MANY medications, hormones, steroids, and supplements. (To God be the Glory! The mere thought of not having my Beccarie now kills me. We almost lost her!)

Dr. Johnson (whom I cannot track down via the internet, but has been an inspiration to me ever since that Hospital stay…) met me soon after. She wiped my tears. She reminded me that GOD is in control. She saw my Bible and book (the same Bringing Up Boys book) on the vanity stand and let me know she was a Christian. She confirmed that I was in her prayers. She would tell me confidently “God told me everything is going to be okay. Don’t cry any more. Every thing is fine.”

Becca, 3 weeks old

I sat for what felt like days in that hospital room. Laid many nights alone. Ambien was prescribed, but didn’t help much. Visitors came and went, though I still appreciate them all. Gifts were brought. Food was made. My 21st birthday was celebrated… In which I received the greatest gift a mother could ever receive. A sonogram confirming that fluid levels had returned to normal, the sack had miraculously resealed itself, and my baby, my sweet Beccarie, was healthy and thriving! Praise Be to God! El Shaddai! (The lyrics of the song: El Shaddai, El Shaddai, El-Elyon na Adonai, Age to age You’re still the same, By the power of the name. El Shaddai, El Shaddai, Erkamka na Adonai, I will praise and lift You high, El Shaddai.)

After many months (felt like years) of bedrest, on January 16th, 2003 I delivered a healthy 8lb 3oz baby girly 2 weeks past her due date. Figures, right? She scored HIGH on the apgar scale and after a hearing test scare, she scored fine 2 days later and had little jaundice. Perfectly healthy. She’s the most creative, loving, courageous, steadfast little girl you’ve ever met. She’s a bit of Mommy, a bit of Daddy, influenced by her step parents evenly, and everything in between… yet a distinction of her own. I’d love her no other way. She is the daughter God gave me, and I am blessed.

Months after her birth, the only music that calmed her was “Lullaby” being hummed (yes, hummed, not played) to her or Amy Grant’s “The Collection” on CD. Naturally, when El Shaddai came on, I cried. He was telling me all along it would be fine, and I didn’t listen. I should have known. So human, right? LOL

The entire time I laid in bedrest though, this was the song I wanted my little girl to sing. She may or may not choose to do so, that is up to her… But it’s her song from her Mama’s heart regardless:



Look up the entire album on iTunes or Amazon. I highly recommend it. (I’m a bit old school… 😉 )