Tag Archive husband

ByAngie

A Letter To My Kids – So They Never Forget

As I am writing this, it is nearly 2 am. Up until about 30 minutes ago I was in bed reading when I heard one of my kids wake up and shuffle around his room. Upon checking to see what was going on,  I found that Tommy, my middle son, had a nightmare and was trying to settle himself back down. Seeing that he needed some comforting, I invited him to come into the living room. He seemed to already know what he needed to soothe him: for me to pray for him, his favorite Pandora station that we have customized over the years to play Rockabye Baby and instrumental hymns, and to lay in my specific spot on the couch.

Just as Tommy was all settled in and I had turned off all the lights he pointed over to my laptop. “Mom, why is your laptop over there? Aren’t you going to write a blog while we are up?” I assumed he was procrastinating falling asleep, so I asked him, “No, what would I write about?” When he replied it was deep. Okay, well, it was deep for a 6-year-old. “I want you to write a blog with a picture of me with you, Jeffrey, Becca, Johnny Ben, and Molly and a picture of you and dad.  Then you can write about how much you and dad love us and how much you love dad, because someday I’ll read a lot and want to read it when I am a grown up.”

I was so caught off guard. I expected him to tell me about his efforts to tell The Joker about Jesus so he won’t be an arch-villain any more. (Yes, that is really a frequent topic of his.) I did not expect him to mention something so emotional and actually relevant. (Dear Mr. Future Tommy, I’m sorry for assuming you wouldn’t be relevant. But you were 6. Someday you’ll have a 6-year-old and know what I mean. Forgive me. Love always, Mrs. Mom From The Past) I promised him I would do so, but a few moments later after he fell asleep I decided to go ahead and do it now.

Why now? In the last few years I have made a lot of to do lists. Most of the items listed on those lists have never been crossed off. I do have good reason for some of that, but I really don’t care why I can’t do this that and the other any more. I’ve been in the process of reorganizing my life and re-prioritizing. (I’ll write more about that another day…) When it comes to my kids, I no longer want to put anything on the back burner if it can be done now.

So Tommy, and my other 4 children, this one is for you…

 

Just my kids and me

Just my kiddos and me – Summer 2013

 

 

Dear Kids,

I could never explain how much I love each of you. You guys are probably so sick of me telling you all the time, but it is true. (Okay, apparently Tommy isn’t tired of it…) These aren’t just words that I have to say nor am I making small talk. You may get tired of me stopping you to give you a hug, sending you a goofy text that ends with an “I love you” in all caps and tons of exclamation points, or saying it out of the clear blue. But I mean every word and I want to be clear to you that I do, with all of my heart, love you.

All 5 of you know how far from perfect I am and how I wish that some things had happened differently. I regret every mistake I have made that has caused you any pain. I’m sorry that because of my past mistakes we are all split in half across the country from each other. I wish that Tommy, Johnny Ben, and Molly could have grown up with Jeffrey and Becca and that you all would see each other every day. I hate that I don’t see all 5 of you on a daily basis. That does NOT mean that I love any of you more than another though. My feelings for each of you are equal. Just remember, we have had some amazing summers as a family. We have inside jokes, hobbies, and many memories that have come out of those times together. Others may think we are weird, but that’s okay. Embrace it. This is how God made us to be, a big silly family full of inside jokes,  and we are happy.

At the same time, because I care so deeply for you, I will not let you just do everything you want. We have rules, consequences, and lots of talks (that you all roll your eyes at… Don’t think I don’t notice…) because I want you to have successful lives and relationships, now and when you are grown. I want you to know right from wrong, good manners, and most of all how much Jesus loves you and wants to be a part of your lives. There are times that you will be angry with me, but I will not apologize for doing my job as your mom.

Not only am I thankful to have you as my children, but I’m thankful that you all have each other as siblings. Even with the age and distance gaps, you all get along more than many other brothers and sisters I know. You all amaze me and bless me so much in many ways, but this is one area that I am extremely blessed. You may bicker and argue occasionally, but when it comes down to what matters, you all look out for and help each other. That’s awesome, thank you!

You may not see how it is possible now, but each of you have taught me so much. Whether it be how to have patience in a hospital with an unforeseen circumstance only to see God work a miracle in His time, how to pour tea like a princess, the name of a little known character in Star Wars, understanding more about the neural system, or something academic. You inspire me to better myself. Each of you blow me away with your wisdom. Yes, even Molly, who at the time of my writing this is 2. You’re all going to do great things. I know it.

It is no secret how much I love your Dad, Bobby. While we all know that Jeffrey and Becca have a different biological father that loves them as well, we were blessed when Bobby came along. He loved you both as if you had always been his and still does. You should know that he has not once referred to you as “step-children” and always as “my son and daughter”. I’m pretty crazy about that man, and he loves all of us very much as well. Even more than Cadillacs, Twinkies, and Coca Cola.

As I bring this to an end, I want to remind you that nothing in this world will ever compare to the love of Jesus. Never give up on Him, because He will never give up on you. Each of you know of times in your lives that He stepped in and touched you with healing or resolve. Never forget what He has done, and thank Him every day. I thank God every day for the privilege of being your Mom. I would go through every one of those pregnancies, labors, sleepless nights, and rough days again in a heartbeat if given the chance. Bobby and all of you are the best thing that ever happened to me outside of salvation. One more time:

I love you, Kids!!!

Love,

Mom

P.S. Tommy, thank you for asking me to write this. It’s not just for you, I needed it as well.

P.P.S. Are there flying cars? Did you guys ever talk me into going back to blonde? Write back your “past mom” and let me know about the future, ‘kay?

 

 

Mom and Dad, sans kids

Just Bobby and Me – Summer 2010

 

If you read through all that and have made it down to the bottom of this post, I urge you to write a letter to your children to read some day. Not only will they be grateful that you did, but you will as well.

 

Happy Mother’s Day

 

ByAngie

E Is For Everlasting Love

GE DIGITAL CAMERAIt’s Friday night. The boys and Molly have built a fort in our living room. Molly has since gone to bed, but the boys are watching a movie and will sleep in here all night… Most likely they will fall asleep on separate sides of the room, but will end up at some point snuggled up to each other because that is what they do. Bobby, my husband, is sitting on the other side of the couch from me. What he’s doing on his computer is beyond me, but he looks relaxed. Earlier today I was able to purchase the plane tickets for my 2 older children to visit this Summer.

To not feel loved at this moment would be impossible. I’m surrounded by a family that loves me and will see more that do soon.

In my life, I have loved many. Friends, family, children, and most of all my husband, to name a few. I have laughed, cried, and literally peed my pants over emotions brought on by those that I love. When it comes to love, I am definitely wealthy. I may not have a lot of money, assets, or possessions. But love? I have an abundance!

Unfortunately, I have learned one thing about all of these people: They are human. Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying anything bad about any of them. My point is that they are going to fail me, no matter how much they don’t want to hurt me. There are those that I love that don’t feel the same about me. There have been some in the past that have outright betrayed me regardless of how much I loved them. There are even those that may not realize they are hurting me at the time, or may let me down with actions that may not seem to them hurts others. It’s human nature; We change our minds, hearts, and feelings all the time. Nothing is guaranteed when it comes to the human heart.

You know what’s amazing? The only love that I can 100% truly count on? One love that will never fail me, or you?

The love of Jesus.

It was the first love I ever learned about in the form of song. First Jesus Loves Me and then Jesus Loves The Little Children. The only love I felt while crying alone in the middle of the night, cold and helpless without anyone to turn to and unsure of where my next meal would come from. The love that held me close and let me know He was there through each and every one of my painful miscarriages. The love that has told me so many times “You can do this! Follow My lead!” when others said “What are you thinking?”

The ONLY love that is guaranteed. The only love that resulted in the forgiveness of every sin I’ve ever committed. The only love that can heal my illness. The only love that can help me to be the woman of God I desire to be. The ONLY love that will never fail me.

This love will never end, and is everlasting. Jesus won’t change His mind tomorrow. Nor can He “fake” his affection for me, as anything He says is made truth. His love does not play favorites, and it doesn’t get moody. His love stands beside me as I laugh, and holds me when all feels hopeless and I’m sure I can not possibly go on.

His love never fails.

EverlastingI can love my husband all the live long day, and I know that Bobby will always be by my side. He is the closest thing possible to the man I prayed for as a little girl in my bedroom playing with my dolls. Our story is truly that which fairy tales are based on. However… My husband has and will fail me. He would never EVER intentionally hurt me. But he’s human as am I.

My parents may see me as their little girl. I can make them beam with pride. (And believe me, I can make them hide in shame, too!) They can do all they can to make me happy and feel loved by them. But their love will never be able to fulfill me the way the love of Jesus can.

Children are the greatest blessing from the Lord. But being a child myself, I know that my children are not required to love me. They may grow up and feel very differently about life than I do. They are going to let me down at some point. And that is okay, I will always love them.

I have been so blessed with many family members and friends. But not one of them will love me in a way that is able to whisper “all is okay” after I’ve lost a pregnancy or have received word about a loved ones death.

Only Jesus, only the love of God is everlasting. Jesus was my first love, after all.

By the way, have you met Jesus? His love is pretty awesome, if you haven’t caught on by now.

38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, 39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Oh, psst… D was going to be for “Down Time”. Oops! Silly blog was attacked. Bah… But to chronicle my “Down Time” you may enjoy the following photos from my weekend in Palm Springs, CA earlier this month:
For the first time in my adult life, I had a TAN!

For the first time in my adult life, I had a TAN!

Don’t forget to head over to Ben & Me to see all the other fantastic posts by others who are also Blogging Through The Alphabet!

Blogging Through the Alphabet

ByKaren

My Valentine

306085_10200107952451594_1449600771_nTwenty years ago this month, I received my first Valentine Bear and half a dozen roses from the love of my life. We had only been together for 3 weeks at the time, so it was like “shock and awe”. I wasn’t expecting anything. I slept with that bear EVERY NIGHT for the 4 and a half years before we got married.

To this day, David has always made sure that I had some sort of flowers or roses for Valentines. Since our “lean” months are in Winter, (he does mowing Spring – Fall, which is more income than his Fire Chief position), I’ve told him that he doesn’t have to order me roses or anything, because I totally understand the financial burden that extra expenses add to an already strapped budget.

  • He always makes sure that I am taken care of. If I need a new bra, he will make sure that I get a good one, because he understands that “good support” doesn’t come from just anywhere…
  • He understands the importance of having “good” pots and pans to cook with. Let’s face it, some of the ones out there are just not fit for food…
  • He know how hard it is to fight with my hair, so he made sure that I have a super duper hair straightener, that will actually work for my hair and not halfway do the job of it’s intent…
  • He makes breakfast every Sunday morning, before church, because he understands how long it takes Mommy to not only get herself ready, but fix both girls hair, make sure the boys look decent, steam anything with wrinkles, and go through at least a dozen outfits before finally going back to the first one I had picked out, and of course, the kids have to eat…
  • He helps wash the laundry because with 6 of us, it can get out of hand pretty fast…
  • He is the spiritual leader of our home and the “bread winner” that definitely puts his family first, after God of course…

I can not complain. I have the best support system in my very own home! I’m pampered and loved by the best Valentine that a gal can have.

By the way, I still have that very first, worn and tattered Valentine Bear…

426455_10200561000337508_505864209_n



ByEmily

For My Boyfriend

Okay, so for real, Markus is my husband. However, not only do I love him, but I like him a whole, whole lot — which also makes him my boyfriend. 😉

 Ecc. 4 11 -3

 

Anyway, I know I’ve read this scripture before, but when I read it the other morning, it stuck out at me. It made me smile, because I always call Markus my heater. When it’s especially cold and it’s time to lay down, I say, “I hope you have your heater on.” When I read this scripture, I sent him a text with the scripture and the sarcastic comment, “Now repent for all of those times you made me move my feet!” He laughed. And that’s another reason why he’s my boyfriend.

 

Recently, he went on a duck hunting trip with his dad and brother. Because of that, I was without my heater for 3 nights in a row. I love him THAT much. And that’s just yet another reason why he’s my boyfriend.

 

I said all that to say that I’m super pumped that God loved ME enough to bless me with an awesome boyfriend/husband/heater. I’m also thankful that God loved me enough to make sure that I wasn’t alone, and I’ll always be warm.

ByKaren

Because I Love My Husband, I Brush My Teeth…

Do you ever have one of those days that just going to the bathroom seems like a chore? You’re so tired that you have to make yourself get up and get going?  Boy, the older I get, the more of these days I have.

Life has a  way of wearing you down.  I bring a lot of it on myself though.  Josie and Isaac both are in middle school.  Both are in band. Josie plays basketball for the middle school team.  Creed is in 3rd grade and has decided not to play youth football this year, which is fine with me.  He loves his DS and his NOOK, which was the only thing he asked for, for his birthday, and asked for it months in advance… He loves art and loves to read. Essie is in 1st grade and does dance.  She has 3 classes a week to prepare for competitions and also is cheering for 1st grade football.

All 4 kids are in the Mighty Warriors Dance/Drama team for church. (We don’t miss church for any activities. God comes first!)

Needless to say, the lives of my children keep me busy!  I wouldn’t trade it for anything though. They do what they love and show God’s light while doing it.

When they are at school, on some days, I work running our church’s mission building. There is sooo much stuff to get done there, that sometimes it feels never ending, but it is so worth it.

I also enjoy watching all of my nieces when I’m needed.  I like to be there for them and want them to know that I’m here for them.

Now that I have SOME of my life laid down, so that you can understand what I do, you can see why I stay tired. David has to work full time but he does help when he can. His mother passed away before he was 3 years old and his father passed away almost 9 years ago.  My mother is disabled, so we don’t have the help that most people do.

More power to the single parents out there or military parents, who have to do things on their own. I’m so glad that I can share my day with my spouse on a daily basis.  God blessed me with David and I could never ask for anyone better.  He provides for us, loves us, and takes care of us all.  He is a living example of what a husband and father are supposed to be for their families.

So, if you have parents, in-laws, etc., that are able and willing to help you in any area, don’t take it for granted. Remember that there are those out there who would love to take advantage of help easing a burden or making their load a little lighter.

Everyday, when David get home, he greets me with a kiss. Even if there may have been some tension over a disagreement and such. Which makes me so glad that I got up and brushed my teeth…

ByDiania

The Rose…

By far the most popular flower God created. It’s  beauty represents love, and friendship and it’s message is clear just by it’s color. Give a red rose and you are sending your love, give a yellow rose and friendship is sent.

Today I dropped my Rose off at the airport, normally I say my good byes knowing we will see each other again in a few months. Holding the tears in today proved to be a little harder then usual, tho I was able to contain them until I drove away…

This time around I realized, or finally admitted just how much I miss having my Becky (My Rose) around. She has grown into a beautiful woman, both inside and out. She is her mommy’s best friend and at the same time she is a daddy’s girl. She holds nothing back. I watched with amazement as she set down next to her daddy and put her arms around him not caring that there was a living room full of people. It took me back to when she was younger, when she was home, and I had her all to my self.

She is the red rose I love, she is my yellow rose whose friendship I will forever hold close to my heart. There’s times I just see the little girl and then, there’s times like today when I have to let the woman my little girl has become fly away home. 34 years ago I never imagined the little pink bundle I  carried home from the hospital would be my best friend some day. She loves me in spite of my flaws, she has my smile, my heart and my love.

Every daughter should be a rose, picked especially for you by God. Every lil girl should be a daddy’s girl, free to sit down with daddy when ever and where ever she want’s. If your little girl needs a daddy hug or your husband just needs a daughter hug, I encourage you to help make that memory happen. After all Daddy isn’t going to be around forever.

So tell me, do you see a rose in your little girl? Are you watching her grow into a beautiful woman? Please don’t blink too long, don’t let the opportunity pass you by to see her bloom from a lil girl to a rose as red as your love is for her…

God blessed you, now enjoy your blessing. I promise you wont regret it. I know without a shadow of a doubt that I don’t….

Love,

ByKaren

Leaving Behind A Legacy With Words & Actions

“Just wait ’til your daddy gets home!”
“I am NOT going to tell you again!”
“How many times do I have to tell you?”

I often find myself yelling these phrases at my 4 children. Not because I want to, but out of the habit of frustration. With my husband being a fire chief and self-employed on the side, I often find myself, in what I call “single parent syndrome”. (Though I have full partnership in parenting our children and this is in NO DISRESPECT, whatsoever, to single parents.) I am often alone with our children and they definitely have their moments when they don’t want to listen.

I don’t want to leave a legacy of yelling and discord with my children. I want them to remember how much I love them and that I would give my very life for them. I want them to remember to love others, no matter what. To bless others. To give even if you have to give your last. To always give God their first fruits in tithe and offerings. That God is first and foremost in our lives and that we must surrender to Him.

These are the things that I want to plant into the hearts of my children. David and I, also, want to make sure that our children know that we love each other. The things that a marriage is built on. That it’s okay to disagree as long as it’s agreeably. If they see him give me a kiss on the cheek or an out and out smooch, they also see the love and fun that radiates from it.

We always make sure that we hug our children and tell them that we love them. I want them to know how to nurture their children, when that day comes. It’s so important for them to know how much we love them and that we are proud of them. A child should always feel secure in the love of their parents and the love that Christ has for them.

I pray, daily, that God will bless my children and help me be the mother that He has called me to be. To give me the wisdom and guidance to help them through this life.

So when it comes to your life, are you sure about what kind of legacy you are leaving for your children? Are you on the right track? If not, there is still time to make a U-turn. Have a blessed day and go give those kiddos a huge hug and a kiss and tell them you love them.

ByEmily

Hiding Him In Little Hearts Week 3: Exodus 20:12

Exodus 20:12 NLT
“Honor your father and mother. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”

Well, as you know by now, I have two beautiful daughters- Naomi who is 4 and Adah who is 2- that are really great kids, but they have their moments where they don’t mind testing my patience. As we were working on our last verse, it crossed my mind that our current verse is a MUST. And before I went on to anything else, Exodus 20:12 had to be this week’s verse.

I was worried about it being a challenge for my girls. Not because of the verse itself, but because of the length. They have been doing great, but this one was a tad longer than they’re used to. I went with the NLT version to make it a little bit more kid friendly. With Adah being younger, I only taught her the first sentence. She did very good remembering it….except that any time I ask her to say it for someone she says, “Honor jour (‘J’s instead of ‘Y’s) mother and jour wife.” I think maybe that’s the version that belongs in the Husband’s Bible. 🙂

For Naomi, I taught her all of it and she did excellent, considering it’s length. She learned most of it and can say almost all of it correctly. I just have to remind her of maybe the first word in the last two sentences and she remembers it. I taught them that honoring their father and mother meant loving, obeying, listening, being good and being respectful. They learned that by doing all of that they not only make Mommy and Daddy happy, but also make Jesus happy.

As the week went on, if Adah was doing something she wasn’t supposed to be doing, Naomi would say, “Mommy! She’s not honoring!” I found this amusing and used it to my advantage. They wanted to honor, and I urged them to follow the commandment God gave to them (and the rest of us).

We didn’t have a big craft this week, but I made them a coloring sheet with the scripture printed on it and a picture of a family. They enjoyed coloring and were excited that they learned another verse. At the end of each week, I always hear, “What’s our next verse, Mommy?” I am so proud of them for how well they’re doing.
Don’t forget to check in next week…we’re learning about praise!

ByAngie

Sticky Hands: Disciplining Mom

DISCIPLINE

2 obsolete:instruction
3: a field of study
4: training that corrects, molds, or perfects the mental faculties or moral character
5 a: control gained by enforcing obedience or order b: orderly or prescribed conduct or pattern of behavior c:self-control
6: a rule or system of rules governing conduct or activity
Yesterday, I took a Facebook survey of my friends to see what was the first word that came to their mind when they heard the word “Discipline“. Jimmy said “Marine“, which I found honorable. Kathleen said “Behaved” which I loved. Kara joked around and mentioned spanking, but said in all seriousness “Teach“. Love that one too! Susie brought up “Consequence“, which is something it seems we all seem to forget about sometimes before we do something, so I really enjoyed this one too. Our very own Emily came back with “Being in order and in line with how you know you’re supposed to be” Wow, huh? When I asked my “Sis” Michele she stated “Inner Strength“. Great one! My buddy Keith said “Focus“, which is so true, isn’t it? Christi said “Correction“, and honestly, I was surprised we got this far down the list without it. Not because it was what I was looking for, but because many associate those to words. Tasha made a good point with “Chaos … I know .. weird, but I guess because if you don’t discipline you have chaos.” She got that one right, didn’t she? Kelli stated “Parents“. Kristianna replied “Consistent“, Dawn “In Order“, and Robin “Biblical“. I love them all! Especially Jessica’s interpretation with “Love“…
What does the above word make you think of? Probably your children, right? We want them to grow up to be wise, well mannered, and well liked so we correct them and mold them all the while praying that God guide us and use us for His good as we raise the next generation.
But what about you, Mom? Who keeps you in line? Who molds you? Who corrects you? Who teaches you? What training has brought you to a place of self control and structure? A Mom without discipline herself would have a very difficult time disciplining her children, would she not? And think about it, how can you be a disciple without discipline?
I know, you want to say “Um, duh Angie. I control myself and with the help of The Lord I do all the others…” Yeah, okay, I know you know this stuff. But I mean I want you to stop and think REALLY hard about this. Read those questions again, one at a time, and ponder them for a moment.
  • Who keeps you in line? Is it you, your pastor, your spouse, and most importantly the Lord? Maybe with a little help from friends & family? If so, good!
  • Now, who molds you? Is it God and God alone? Sure we can be influenced by others, but I am talking about molding you. There was a time that my friends molded me, the ways of celebrities and what I thought I should be instead of what God wanted me to be were how I was molded. Obviously, I had a lot of cracks and was very oddly shaped. (Not claiming to be perfect now, still a few defects there…)
  • Who is correcting and teaching you? A few months ago during the Summer, I woke up one morning and God started dealing with me to change some things in my life. The conviction was so strong that I had to stop doing the morning dishes and just cry, which lead to a lot of prayer. It was as if He had taken a switch to my backside and I instantly realized my wrong doing and WHY it was wrong when I didn’t even see it before. You’d think I’d be angry, but no, I was more in love with my Savior than before. I was so glad that I finally let HIM correct me instead of the world. So refreshing!
  • What training have you received? Well, as Christians we read our Bibles, listen to sermons, and read books penned by anointed hands. All of these used as a combination are a great way to learn to walk the straight and narrow.
Discipline from God is a key part in living in His will. As my husband says, “You shouldn’t have the intestinal fortitude of licorice.” When we stand strong, firm, practicing self-control and willing to accept His correction we find that the path, while straight and narrow, becomes a lot clearer to see.
Now, PLEASE, share your answers if you are willing. Let us all encourage each other and lift one another up!
1 Whoever loves instruction loves knowledge, But he who hates correction is stupid.2 A good man obtains favor from the Lord, But a man of wicked intentions He will condemn.3 A man is not established by wickedness, But the root of the righteous cannot be moved. Proverbs 12:1-3 NKJV
ByAngie

Living Your Legacy: Walking The Walk And Talking The Talk

It’s really easy to get an idea of what we would LIKE for our legacy to be. Living that legacy, well, that can be another story, right? Just like everything else in parenting, easier said than done.

So how can we set those examples before our children and others?

Well, first of all, we must strive daily to NOT be a “Do as I say, not as I do” parent. Telling our children to live one way while we live another is obviously not the way to achieve a Godly legacy.

Second, if we want our children to grow up and have meaningful relationships we must show them that by our example also. Being a true friend, a loving wife, a good daughter, etc are all ways for them to learn how to interact with others on their own. If we talk trash behind others backs, hold grudges, allow our husbands to put us down or abuse us emotionally or physically, disrespect our husbands, and argue consistently with our families then our children will believe that these actions are acceptable. Plain and simple. When your kids are grown and they shine in their relationships, I guarantee someone is going to say “They must have had a really fantastic mother.” Seriously.

I have to remind myself of these things EVERY day. I am human, and sometimes I have to stop myself and say “Hey! Don’t be a hypocrite! Little eyes are watching you, as are those of others who expect you to be what you say, a Christian. Shape up!”

Thankfully, with diligent prayer and discipline, we can do our best and bring up our children to know the Lord and live his ways… I’m going to try my hardest. Will you?

Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.

Proverbs 22:6 NKJV